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希望你永远快乐,可以吗....
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Just wanna know u more, just wanna become the one who
can take better care of you from now on, just wanna let you
know how much I love u though I seldom say that.
Life is changed when u walk into my world, as some of my habits.
I begin to care whether my phone has run out or there are new
massages I do not read in order to make sure I can answer ur
phone on time. I know there are dozens of things remain to be
done before I get used to live in a world of two.
However, I know that I am living the last moments of my carefree
time when you cling on round my neck, that I will not be the same
people before u know anymore.
-
There were some network problems in my blog and caused a
failure that I couldn’t publish any diaries these days. But if I had
published these diary 3 days ago, I shall have to say I went to the
church and participated in a qualifying test of an English choir, but
I failed. Maybe because I was the youngest in the contestants or I
was honest to tell them in the application form that I could not make
sure whether I would attend all of the training classes, or maybe they
did not need a pop-music style singer. Actually I did not feel sad for
my failure, contrarily, I was excited that I did an English introduction
to myself and sang an English song in front of more than 30 contestants
without any preparation before.
However, I told the qualifying test again on Sunday, with more
confidence, and this time I passed. I will try my best, so, God, help me. -
The winter holiday end all so soon that I can’t quite feel I has passed
the winter, or to be precise, I live in a city without winter days.
It seems a little tough in the next semester, however, I hope it do not
prevent me from going for my dreams.
Anne said I belong to everyone. Like a public-sweetheart? I know you didn’t
mean that, but I don’t want to be regarded in that way, not at all. I just want
to say I belong to nobody, never want to be tied down by any emotion, even
friendship, or be fettered by any convention.
I lost contact with Nana, who said “I will be back when you feel lonely.”
I finished all the box of chocolate, for celebrating the coming of the Valentine’s Day. -
Answered a phone from London till 1am, and bathed back to the
soundlessness in my room. On the phone, L said his sister was getting
married. “Glad to hear this.” I congratulated, but suddenly there was
a sentence came full upon my recollection that marry off a girl always
makes one sad.
My cousin back from France today, nicer, more elegant, and gave
me a box of chocolates as gift, which made me recalled those days
when I was addicted to chocolate. I think chocolate is something can
really compel someone to smile, maybe that’s why it could be one of
the commonly pleasing gift.
After watching a film named ‘Seven Pounds’, a sad movie, I gazed
at the screen and fell into a delicate state of melancholy by the last song-Have
no fear-in the film, simultaneously, another sentence came up in my mind
that we're meant to lost the people we love, and then we will know how
important they are to us. -
Without any awareness, a week has passed after I began my holiday.
Though there was no more new journal published in my blog, I can still find
some traces from my visitors, and I want to say thanks for your support.
These days I just keep drinking milk-tea, drink it in the coffee bar, in the
restaurant, and even in the billiards bar. Furthermore, I lost a billiard game
to a girl, who surprises me by her billiards skills though she just learned it
for 2 month. Shopping is my other favorite sport, but I’m waiting for the
cut-rate vacation. Benbo’s new winter fashions are a little mature, and
according to my experience, the best time to buy Benbo clothes is after the
Spring Festival holidays, at that time you will get a nicer discount, and also
there are some new styles published. Asked Anita out to get a coffee, but we
spent lots of time and walked a long way to find a coffee shop. We had a lot
to chat, from friends to girlfriend and boyfriend, from movie to plans for our
future. Suddenly, I found that we hadn’t seen each other for more than one
year; what’s more, I gradually realized that someone I would probably never
meet anymore. Chao said she bought a box of instant milk-tea, but I had to
tell her I was sated with it. Sated with something, I still miss you. Fox said she
put on weight, but she emphasized that she was still slender. Life goes on. -
The final exams are around the corner. Life becomes more
intense. Occupied by routines, doing the same things everyday,
I don’t think I have known how to live yet, or have pointed myself
the way of how to live.
A few days ago, I watched a movie named “Nine Winds”,
which show a world of 9 high-school students. I just indulge into
my memories after I finished it, and lasted for some time. Years
passed so quickly that I can’t follow the traces of those days when
we went out for a drive, sunshine accompanied us on our way, wind
blowing on our face. At that time, life was simple, and unrequited love
was natural, though it made us to appear foolish. Friendship and love
were mingled together and filled our life. For love, a simple handholding,
a hugging could make our heart go faster. Those commitments we gave
each other were romantic though we didn’t keep them anymore. For
friendship, for those friends we lived together as brothers, personal
loyalty infiltrated into our thinking and judgments. Talking about girls
joyfully, commenting their appearances, exchanging those experiences
of chasing girls, we exhibited our youth and vigor without hesitation,
and it seemed that joy and laugh will accompany us the rest of our life.
But those days has gone, with those wonderful memories, with those
naïve loves. The traces of the past have become so faint that I’m too
tired to recall them.
In the movie, there are 9 students. Maybe some of them are the
figures of your high school pals, and, furthermore, which one looks like
you among them? -
I find that sometimes I’m also easy to feel loneliness, eager
for company, but, instead, I just disguise myself that nobody can
perceive my weakness. Some of my friends show me their sadness
when they face the emotional troubles, and what I can do is merely
try to comfort them, which make me see my own weakness in some
way.
I think we get some erroneous ideas about love, which seems to
fade our love away in this secular society. When working, making
money and daily grind begin to charge our life, when we feel tired of
living, we have to learn to live in a world of mistakes and vanities as
if they are necessary to life. But love is not like that. However, if you
find that your love hurts you, destroys your life or brings you sadness
much more than happiness, then love has become a synonym for burden
for you to bear. Why not to discard it when it is no longer sweet. We
don’t need to hold it in order to deceive ourselves that because love
involves faith, courage, firmness and so forth. No more disguise, and no
more misgiving.
Here, I want to say thanks to a girl, thanks for your call on my birthday,
for your company on that night. Thank you to give me a jolly night, though
it is supposed to be tedious. I want to say sorry at the same time, sorry
for my leaving abruptly without a word, sorry for my forgetting to revert to
your messages. Forgive my carelessness. I don’t want to miss any more.
